Atomic Habits for Moms

I recently had a great conversation with Maria Morera Johnson on the CatholicMomcast. It was a great conversation (you can listen to the 26-minute episode here). We discussed all our favorite mom hacks, but I’ll be honest: my kids interrupted many times, and I felt very frazzled as I tried to share what was on my heart.

Here’s a mom hack for you: ALWAYS get a sitter for podcast interviews.

In all seriousness, though, many ideas have been rolling around since our chat, so I thought I would continue the conversation here with all of you. So, now that we have established that I absolutely do not have it all together, here are my thoughts on what is working in this season of motherhood.

Atomic Habits for Moms

As mothers, our days feel full before our feet even hit the floor. The needs come fast and constant: meals to make, diapers to change, math lessons to teach, squabbles to referee, work deadlines, and maybe—if we’re honest—a lingering guilt over the prayer time we wish we had but can’t seem to make space for.

When I first read James Clear’s Atomic Habits, I was struck by his reminder that small, consistent changes lead to big results. For moms, especially Catholic moms striving to live intentionally in the chaos, the key isn’t cramming more into our already packed days. It’s letting God into the little things we’re already doing.

Here are a few ways to start building tiny, grace-filled habits into daily life—without adding more pressure, and without waiting for a mythical “perfect season” that may never come.

1. Start Small: One Tiny Habit That Changes Everything

For me, that habit is prayer.

Not the hour-long, candlelit holy hour I wish I had most mornings. I’m talking about a simple Morning Offering over coffee, a whispered “Jesus, I trust in You” while buckling a car seat, a Memorare while unloading the dishwasher. These small, hidden prayers anchor the day, reminding us whose we are.

I’ve even tied habits together: coffee + prayer. My “Morning Offering mug” is my cue to turn my first sip into praise.

Some mornings, journaling helps me recenter—filling the tank before I pour myself out for my family. Other days, I pray the Rosary on a walk or listen to the Divine Office while folding laundry. Prayer doesn’t have to be perfect. It just has to be real.

Jesus tells us in John 15:5:

“Apart from Me, you can do nothing.”

Not a little.

Not “not much.”

Nothing.

There’s so much freedom in that surrender. Fr. Jacques Philippe uses the image of a still lake like the one in our family photo—when the water is calm, it reflects the mountain perfectly. When it’s agitated, nothing is clear. Our souls are like that lake. Prayer invites the stillness where Christ can be reflected.

2. Stack Your Habits: Invite God Into What You’re Already Doing

One of Clear’s most helpful strategies is habit stacking—pairing a new habit with an existing one. For Catholic moms, this can be a game-changer:

• Morning Offering mug to pray before coffee

• Rosary walks to feed your soul and steward your health

• Laundry folding can be paired with a podcast or audiobook that lifts you up

• Nursing time is a favorite of mine to pray a decade of the Rosary or the Divine Mercy Chaplet

• Got a commute? listen to the Divine Office, an audio Rosary, or Scripture

• Paste prayer prompts: tape Scripture verses on mirrors, post a Saint Francis prayer above the sink, or swap out letterboard verses in the kitchen

• Sacred pauses like the Angelus at noon, a quick Memorare in the mess, a jubilant “Thank You, Jesus!” when something goes right

These small anchors keep us tethered to Christ without overcomplicating the day.

3. Develop Walls for Your Digital Rule of Life

James Clear reminds us that environment shapes behavior. One of the most freeing shifts I made was dumbing down my phone.

I stripped it down to what truly serves my vocation: text messages, camera, Divine Office app, Rosary app, banking, podcasts, and audiobooks. No social media. No Amazon. No browser. No YouTube.

For Catholic moms, protecting our attention is a spiritual discipline. Our ability to pray, to be present to our kids, and to love well depends on where our attention rests.

If you want to reclaim quiet, here are a few ideas:

• Delete distractions. Create distance from apps that rob your peace.

• Use Instapaper. Save intentional reading for waiting rooms instead of endless scrolling.

• Take phone Sabbaths. Put it away during breakfast, bedtime, or weekends.

• Read more. A 2009 University of Sussex study found that just six minutes of reading a day can reduce stress by 68%. That’s six minutes you could spend scrolling—but why not fill your soul instead?

Our phones aren’t just costing us serenity—they’re costing us presence. Every yes to distraction is a no to real life unfolding right in front of us.

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4. Lean Into Seasons

Moms don’t need more pressure. We need more peace.

I’ve learned to work with the seasons God has given me. In summer, my rhythm shifts toward writing, recording podcasts, and creative deep dives. During the school year, our days move into homeschooling mode.

A few rhythms that help keep both home and soul grounded:

• Meal planning on autopilot. We have Muffin Mondays, Toast Tuesdays, and Oatmeal Thursdays. Decision fatigue, gone.

• Zone cleaning on a loop. Even if you miss a day, it cycles back around.

• Daily anchors. Morning prayer, school blocks, rest time, dinner prep, bedtime ritual—our kids thrive when they know what to expect.

• Movement matters. Even 20 minutes of walking daily improves longevity and energy. If 20 feels like too much, start with five. Small steps add up.

• Build margin. Everything takes longer than you think. Leaving space for interruptions transforms frustration into flexibility.

Rhythms free us from constantly reinventing the wheel and make space for spontaneous joy.

5. Little Loaves, Big Miracles

At the end of the day, Catholic motherhood isn’t about doing more—it’s about bringing our loaves and fishes and trusting God to multiply them.

Some days we get it wrong. We lose our patience. We yell. We fail. But those moments are invitations to model humility:

“I’m sorry. Please forgive me.”

The devil loves to steal our peace when we fail, but every failure is a chance to grow in humility. As Fr. Jacques Philippe reminds us in Searching for and Maintaining Peace, our littleness isn’t a problem—it’s the place where God meets us.

Every small step, every whispered prayer, every imperfect effort adds up over time. Holiness doesn’t happen in grand gestures. It happens in the hidden, ordinary, repeated moments of saying “yes.”

Motherhood is a thousand tiny habits lived faithfully. And when we root those habits in Christ, our small steps begin to ripple into eternity.

YOUR turn! Tell me your favorite “mom hack” in the comments below!

How I "Do It All" (And Why I Don’t)

Last weekend, my hairdresser paused, mid-snip, to stare at me through the mirror and ask, perplexed,

“How do you do it all?”

I get this question a lot. It usually happens right after they find out I homeschool four kids, tend a sprawling garden, write books, and host a podcast. I used to respond, “I don’t know,” with a laugh. Even to me, it sounds at least a little crazy.

But lately, I’ve been feeling the Holy Spirit tug at me, gently urging me to share on this topic, to invite others into the secret stillness He is teaching me. To hover midair, like a hummingbird whose wings never stop beating, and to find stillness in the perpetual motion of motherhood.

It’s not something I do perfectly (and maybe that is the simple answer to how I do it all: not well). But that is also part of the lesson that is unfolding for me in this season. That is part of what He spoke to me through writing Grow Where You’re Planted. I thought it was going to be a book about gardening. Turns out, the Lord was using it to invite me to have patience with the messiness of my soul. It is about growing in whatever space you have, but more than that, it is about letting go of perfectionism. Only if we draw on His peace first, can we progress in virtue.

And with that, I proceed to share with you the few bits and pieces that comprise my secret—if you can all it that—to “doing it all.”

1. I Don’t Use Social Media

When I first started blogging, I heeded what I now believe to be misguided advice: that I had to be on social media if I wanted anyone to read what I was writing. As it turns out, social media isn’t great for converting readers to book buying, and there are lots of other factors publishers look at when considering your “platform.” That’s not to say that a giant social media following doesn’t opens doors quickly—and lots of them. But from my perspective as a creator, it was stealing my time, peace, and attention, without giving anything back.

It took multiple attempts for my “goodbye” to stick; the steady dopamine drip has been intentionally designed to create behavioral addiction, after all. Now that I am on the other side, having broken the chains of digital enslavement, I say with zero exaggeration that I count giving up social media as among the best decisions of my life.* Detaching from that world has given me my life, peace, and presence back. Saying “no” to it has given me space to say “yes” to what matters most: prayer, my family, homeschooling, writing, gardening, and living in the present.

2. I Ask for Help

This one is harder. It’s vulnerable to admit I can’t handle everything on my own. But I’ve learned that asking for help—from my husband, from friends, from community—isn’t weakness. It’s humility.

“It takes a village” is a cliche for a reason. We were created in the image and likeness of God, who is Trinity—a communion of loving persons. Every time I open my hands to receive help, I’m reminded that my worth isn’t tied to self-sufficiency. And, often, I find that those who pitch in to help are blessed by their gift. After all, we “find ourselves in the sincere gift of self,” (a favorite quoted phrase of my favorite pope). When we try to do it all ourselves, 1. we will fail, but 2. more importantly, we may in fact be depriving others of the opportunity to answer God’s divine call to give of themselves. That favorite pope of mine also reminds us that every member of a family is called to become “a servant of the others,” (a challenging phrase when I am tempted to tell the kids that I am not their servant!) Receiving help is an act of humility intrinsic to God’s divine plan for humanity.

The desire to only ever be the one giving help? That is pride. True gift of self means all of us, offering what we have to give, yes, but also coming to one another with the fullness of vulnerability and learning to accept the concrete offering of love from one another. After all, if God is love, then refusing to accept help is refusing to accept God himself hidden in that act of love.

3. I Give God My Loaves and Fishes

Even after ditching the world’s most destructive time-suck and soliciting help from my husband and every friend’s older daughter to babysit, etc. I am still not enough. And, honestly, that is feature, not a bug.

The work of motherhood will bring you to your knees. Literally. And praise God for that.

I keep coming, time and again, to the multiplication of the loaves and fishes. God takes what we give Him, and He makes it enough.

When I think about it, five loaves of bread and and two fish actually sounds like a lot for one person’s lunch. But it’s nowhere near enough to feed a crowd. And isn’t that the story of motherhood? What we bring to the table, bountiful as it may be, just isn’t sufficient for what’s asked of us.

And yet, in John’s Gospel, Jesus says, “Apart from me, you can do nothing.” Not a little. Not not much. Nothing.

I’ve gained a deep peace by surrendering to that fact (that you, Fr. Jacques Phillipe!). Our job isn’t to be enough—it’s to offer what little we have, our own loaves and fishes, and trust Him to multiply them.

Becoming an Empty Vessel

Caryll Houselander wrote the best book I have ever read about Mary, The Reed of God. One of the many images she uses to describe Our Lady is that of an empty cup. The perfection of humanity, free from the stain of sin, is so glorious because she allows the Lord to fill her entire being. What people encounter in this living tabernacle is not the vessel herself, but God within her.

These days, when I return to the Holy Sacrament of the Eucharist, I pray to become a hollow cup, an empty vessel—so that Christ can fill me, so that His abundance can pour out into my family, my work, and my life. Recognizing that I not only can I not do it all, but I can do nothing has been a great gift, the key to surrendering my own wil, my own plans, my own pride in anything that my hands may accomplish throughout the day. If it was good, it came from Him, period. And I can rejoice in gratitude for that gift of Him showing up in my life.

“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness,” (2 Cor. 12:9).

In other words, all He needs from me is surrender. The more we recognize our powerlessness, the more we’re able to do. Anything we’re able to do is only by His grace to begin with.

The Myth of Balance

I used to fret over trying to achieve the perfect balance between many competing priorities. But the reality is somewhat different. Balance is not a steady state; it requires constant adjustment (any my sweeping changes to our life and routine weren’t helping!) Consistent, small adjustments. Patience with myself when I fail. Being utterly unsurprised by own littleness and failings. Reaching arms up to my Father to allow Him to pick me up and kiss my boo boos once again.

Balance isn’t even really what I do. I juggle. Badly. And most of the time, “doing it all” is actually a constant practice in selectively prioritizing which ball I am going to drop this time.

And every time I drop it, 1. I hope I chose something of lesser importance in Heaven’s eyes, and 2. my failure is a gift because it sends me running back to my Maker.

Because our invitation was never to do it all. It’s about remembering time and again, that there is One who does it all. And we are not Him.

**Yes, Substack Notes counts as social media, at least in my digital rule of life, because of the biological effects it has on my nervous system. If social media works for you, great. We need missionaries in every corner of the earth. Still, I’d encourage you to create your own digital rule of life to articulate life-giving boundaries so that whatever tech is important to you will be governed by your prayerful decision, not the default settings its manufacturers give it to mine your brain for the precious commodities of your time and attention.

Slow Motherhood, Or How I Found My Way Back to What Matters

When I first started writing publicly seven years ago, I stumbled upon the trend of praying to receive a word for the year. I hoped it would be something exciting, something God would use to affirm and fuel my transition into the world of sharing my soul with readers.

Instead, I got: slow.

As usual, I was a little, ahem, slow on the uptake.

Years later, I see that that I have always been in rush, in a hurry to enter the next stage, receive the next thing.

Now, in this season of motherhood, I am finally starting to let this lesson, this discipline of slow sink in. There’s a reason “Vienna” by Billy Joel was my favorite song as a teenager, why Chardin’s “Patient Trust” won’t leave me alone, and why, when everything in my life—from homeschooling pace to the biotechnologies that I study to book publishing—seems to be accelerating at an unprecedented pace, the gentle whisper of the Lord continues to beckon me to a quieter, slower rhythm of life.

I am finally ready to listen.

Two years ago, I nearly lost the ability to mother at all. Chronic illness stripped me of my plans, my rhythms, my strength. It left me staring at the fragile edges of what I thought I could control. In the quiet that followed, I felt a new invitation—or rather, the old one—whisper back to me:

To return.

To rest.

To savor the fleeting beauty of these ordinary days.

I thought I knew what “slow” meant back then. But I’m learning now that slow isn’t stillness in the way I imagined. It’s more like the hummingbird: wings beating furiously, yet somehow hovering, motion and stillness held in tension.

That’s the vision of Slow Motherhood—not a promise of perfectly calm days, but a posture of peace inside the whirlwind. A way of noticing, of savoring, of gathering up these messy, beautiful, fleeting years while we still have time to make them.

What Is Slow Motherhood?

Slow motherhood is waffles and pancakes on Saturday mornings, sticky fingers and syrupy smiles.

It’s graham cracker castles collapsing in the backyard and late-night campouts under a sky full of stars.

It’s checking the milkweed for tiny signs of life—the fragile promise of butterfly chrysalises tucked beneath green leaves.

It’s playing in the rain, stomping through mud puddles, and baking a thunder cake while the storm rattles the windows.

It’s popcorn on the couch, family movies tangled in blankets, and jumping on the trampoline until the constellations come out.

Slow motherhood is pausing long enough to notice—the sticky kisses, the endless questions, the sacred ordinariness of it all.

It’s making memories we’ll one day ache to return to.

Slow motherhood is savoring the present moment so we can relish the good old days—while we’ve still got time to make them.

Slow motherhood is savoring the present moment so we can relish the good old days—while we’ve still got time to make them.

What You’ll Find Here

This newsletter has always been about sharing grace and raising saints, but with this shift, I want to give you something more intentional, more rooted. Here’s what you can expect:

• Prayerful Reflections: finding God in the middle of spilled Cheerios and endless laundry

• Joyful Rhythms: building gentle routines that nourish your home, your children, and your soul

• Practical Wisdom: tips, encouragement, and resources to help you savor motherhood—not just survive it

• Stories & Stillness: moments of wonder, awe, and connection, even when life feels chaotic

Slow motherhood isn’t about doing less. It’s about being more present in the life we already have.

A New Beginning

I’m so grateful you’re here. This community has been with me through many seasons—from the early days of motherhood to my first published book to now, when illness and uncertainty have rewritten my pace. This shift isn’t so much a change as it is a coming home.

Together, we’ll lean into the wild, messy, sacred gift of these ordinary days and learn to find the stillness of the hummingbird—the quiet center in the middle of motion. Here’s to savoring the “good old days”—while we’re still living them.

AMDG,

Samantha

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Carmelite Principles for a Peaceful Home with Tina Mayeux

Listen to the wisdom of Tina Mayeux, sorority girl turned Carmelite turned stay-at-home mom. Tina shares all about what drew her to the Carmelites, as well as the ordering principles of Carmelite spirituality that have shaped her motherhood over the years. You won’t want to miss Tina’s tips for creating a peaceful, Christ-centered home!

The BEST Books for Catholic Wives, Mothers, and Homemakers

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Motherhood and homemaking are profound callings that require both practical skills and spiritual wisdom. Over the years, I’ve come across books that have enriched my journey, offering encouragement, insight, and inspiration. Today, I’m sharing my favorite books for motherhood and homemaking—each one a treasure that has shaped my understanding of what it means to nurture a home and family in alignment with God’s plan.

1. Apostolate of Holy Motherhood

This book beautifully captures the sanctity and responsibility of motherhood. It’s a collection of the experiences of an anonymous visionary that inspires mothers to embrace their vocation as a spiritual mission. The themes of prayer, sacrifice, and dedication resonate deeply, reminding us that our efforts as mothers have eternal significance.

2. Counsels of Perfection for Christian Mothers

This timeless guide provides practical advice and spiritual encouragement for mothers striving for holiness. Its focus on cultivating virtue in daily life and raising children in the faith makes it a must-read for Christian mothers who seek to balance the demands of homemaking with their spiritual lives.

3. In Praise of Stay-at-Home Moms by Dr. Laura Schlessinger

Dr. Laura celebrates the invaluable role of mothers who choose to stay home and prioritize their families. This book is a heartfelt affirmation of the importance of a mother’s presence in her children’s lives. It’s a great reminder that our sacrifices as homemakers are worthwhile and deeply impactful. (A hard read if you are working but want to be home, however, listening on audio gave me the courage to tell my husband I HAD to quit working, and the consolation I needed when that transition ended up being a trying one).

4. Being There: Why Prioritizing Motherhood in the First Three Years Matters by Erika Komisar

Erika Komisar presents compelling research on the emotional and developmental benefits of a mother’s presence during the early years of a child’s life. This book underscores the irreplaceable role of mothers, offering both encouragement and practical advice for those navigating this critical season of parenting.

5. Let Me Be a Woman by Elisabeth Elliot

Elisabeth Elliot’s reflections on womanhood, marriage, and faith are profound and deeply moving. This book is a beautiful exploration of what it means to embrace our God-given identity as women. Her wisdom encourages us to find joy and purpose in the roles of wife, mother, and homemaker.

6. The Privilege of Being a Woman by Alice von Hildebrand

This book celebrates the unique dignity and vocation of women. Von Hildebrand eloquently discusses the spiritual strengths of femininity, offering a countercultural perspective that affirms the beauty of motherhood and homemaking as a divine calling.

7. The Eternal Woman by Gertrud von le Fort

Von le Fort’s poetic and philosophical exploration of womanhood is deeply inspiring. This book examines the timeless qualities of femininity and their relevance in every aspect of life, including motherhood and homemaking. It’s a rich read that invites reflection on the deeper meaning of our roles as women.

8. Holiness for Housewives by Dom Hubert van Zeller

This gem of a book is perfect for mothers who feel overwhelmed by the demands of daily life. Dom van Zeller offers practical advice on how to find holiness in the ordinary tasks of homemaking. His insights remind us that our work in the home can be a path to sanctity.

9. Graced and Gifted: Biblical Wisdom for the Homemaker’s Heart by Kimberly Hahn

Kimberly Hahn’s book is a wonderful resource for homemakers looking to align their daily routines with biblical principles. She combines practical advice with spiritual insights, offering guidance on everything from meal planning to fostering a prayerful home environment.

10. Summa Domestica: Order and Wonder in Family Life by Leila Lawler

Leila Lawler’s comprehensive guide to homemaking is a treasure trove of wisdom. She covers everything from managing a household to nurturing family relationships, all while emphasizing the beauty and dignity of home life. Her practical tips and philosophical reflections make this book a must-have for any homemaker. She is really a straight shooter and I appreciate that!

11. A Mother’s Rule of Life: How to Bring Order to Your Home and Peace to Your Soul by Holly Pierlot

Holly Pierlot shares her journey from chaos to peace by creating a “rule of life” inspired by monastic traditions. This book provides a framework for mothers to balance their spiritual, personal, and family responsibilities. It’s a practical and inspiring guide for anyone seeking greater harmony in their home.

12. The Domestic Monastery by Ronald Rolheiser

Ronald Rolheiser draws parallels between monastic life and the vocation of motherhood. This short but powerful book highlights how the daily routines of family life can become a form of prayer and spiritual growth. It’s a comforting reminder that our ordinary tasks have extraordinary value.

13. A Woman After God’s Own Heart by Elizabeth George

Elizabeth George’s classic book encourages women to pursue a life centered on God’s priorities. She provides practical advice on building a strong marriage, raising children, and creating a Christ-centered home. Her wisdom is both inspiring and actionable.

14. The Theology of Home Series by Carrie Gress, Noelle Mering, and Emily Malloy

This series is a visual and spiritual feast that celebrates the beauty and purpose of homemaking. Each book combines stunning photography with thoughtful reflections on how our homes can become sanctuaries that reflect God’s love. The series is a beautiful reminder of the sacredness of our daily work.

These books have been a source of encouragement and growth for me as a mother and homemaker. They remind me that our work in the home is not only practical but deeply spiritual. Whether you’re looking for practical tips, spiritual inspiration, or affirmation of your vocation, these titles offer a wealth of wisdom. I hope they bless you as much as they have blessed me!

If you are a lover of books in this genre, I invite you to consider picking up a copy of one of my books,

• Mama Prays, a compilation of devotional-style stories from early motherhood

• Reclaiming Motherhood from a Culture Gone Mad, a theology of the body for motherhood, including how to stand firm with the Church on marriage and family, while navigating the ethically fraught bioethical realities of childbirth, IVF, surrogacy, and genetic technologies.

  or by following along with my newsletter for pre-order information for my forthcoming books to be published in 2026:

• The Bellbind Letters: Inside the Devil’s Plan for Your Motherhood, a creative take on C.S. Lewis’s spiritual classic (join me at CatholicMom.com for a Lenten bookclub!)

• Grow Where You’re Planted: Reclaiming Eden in Your Own Backyard, a family guide to cultivating seasonal abundance and self-sufficient living (releasing early spring — preorder and get my gardening masterclass for free!)